It’s a real thing. But I feel it’s something that’s really hard to explain or understand unless you’ve experienced it yourself – but that doesn’t mean I can’t try right?
Despite the name given to it, it’s not all about listening. Sure, listening alone can be exhausting, but people ask, if that were the case wouldn’t everyone experience it every day? But contrary to what most people believe, as good as hearing aids can be, they don’t make your hearing “perfect” or “normal”!
It’s not just about listening. It’s lip reading; it’s putting together words with the few sounds you pick up; it’s switching from person to person in a conversation; for me it’s the constant background noise that my hearing aids pick up instead of the noise I need to hear. It’s your brain constantly working to try keep up without being given the extra time to piece things together and process it all.
Personally, I find I need to switch off every few hours to “recharge”. I need a period in some place quieter, not having to listen, to be able to be in my own bubble of quietness – zone out if you will.
For me, I find reading a book is the best way for me to do this. But obviously I can’t always be carrying round a book, so flicking through my phone does the trick – it allows me to switch my brain off for just a few minutes.
With the current situation, it’s made life a little tougher for everyone, but I find it exhausting everyday trying to work with masks and screens. A lot of people often ask me “what can I do to help make it easier for you?”. Often, I just reply “there’s not a lot anyone can do”, but sometimes it’s the little things that can make a big difference, so here a few:
• Don’t label me as rude – while I tend to try stick it out, occasionally I may take myself off away from all the noise, even just to the corner of a room to have five minutes on my phone or read a book, I’m not being rude I just want some quiet.
• Understand I may not always want to say I need a minute – I’m used to dealing with my hearing troubles by myself (plus anyone who knows me knows I am very stubborn and like to do things myself), so if I spend my break at work in a corner by myself and don’t seem fully part of the conversation, or take a five minute toilet break, it’s just because I’m tired, I need a few minutes to recharge myself to get through the next part of my day until I can have another break.
• Try to allow me extra time to process sounds – try allow me time to focus on one sound at a time, whether that be just getting my attention before speaking to me so I know to focus on you, so I can focus on processing just you.
In our current situation with coronavirus, masks and screen, while being great for everyone’s safety, make everything a lot harder to communicate, so I am even more exhausted than usual. So please, the biggest thing I ask, on behalf of anyone with hearing loss or tinnitus, please be just be patient.